Hi, I'm Kirsty

I'm here to help you design your best future.  One free of regret. 

You see, today more than ever people are walking around dead on the inside.  Unsatisfied, unfulfilled and wishing there was more. But it doesn't have to be this way!

 Whether you want to work 1:1 or book me as your next guest speaker, let's chat!

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Releasing The Things That No Longer Serve Us...

Releasing The Things That No Longer Serve Us...

Welcome to Monday, the start of a new week.  I just wanted to drop by and give you some of the thoughts that have been going through my head. This week, I’m really aware of the noise that’s in my life and I thought I could share this with you too.

So what I want to ask you is what are some of the things in your life which are creating noise or some of the things which are no longer serving you and potentially holding you back from where you want to go?

I’m all about creating our dream future, creating a positive outlook on life and we’ve all got things that we need to go through. We’ve all got things that we have to get over, get through, work around. But I believe that we also carry a lot of power in our decisions and in our lifestyles that we can use to create our ultimate future.

So thinking about this week, I want to ask you what is it that you want to get out of this week. What are the things that are holding you back from becoming the ultimate best version of you?

For me, (I’m going to be thinking about this too) it could be a whole lot of stuff that’s going on. It might be a habit. We all have habits. Some are good, some not so good and so it might be a habit where we keep doing something that’s not serving us. It’s not getting us our dream life. It’s just actually holding us back because it has become something that’s a bit of a routine. It has become something that we ‘just do’.   And quite often we’re not even aware that we do do it.

It might be a habit. It could be a relationship. It could be somebody that you have in your life. It might be a family member, somebody at work, a girlfriend, boyfriend, somebody you spend time with and they’re just not giving you the positivity that you need. They’re giving you something else, which is creating noise and making it harder to really create your brightest future pathway.

Or, it could be a food that you eat. If you struggle with emotional eating or there’s something where you really just keep eating the same food and you eat it and in the end you think, “Oh, why did I do that? Why did I do that?” You don’t feel good about doing it but then the next day it happens again, and then again.

So that’s something that’s going to create noise. It’s going to create negativity in life and it could be a way that you’re doing something, an activity that you’re involved in, a routine in your day, the way that you perhaps get to and from work. It could be something like that.

For example, if you’re driving at the wrong time, it’s making life more stressful, perhaps because you didn’t get up quite so early. Making a little tweak like getting up five minutes earlier to miss that real peak hour of traffic could make a massive difference in your stress levels in your life and the noise level in your life as well.

So this all sounds really good, right? But how do you do that? I can hear you asking.  But that’s good, because I’ve got six points and this is what I’m going to be focusing on, on this week too.

The first thing is for us to get mindful.  It’s really easy to rush through our life. Rush, rush, rush, doing this, doing that, because that’s what we do. Not because we’re in the process of thinking about what we’re doing or we’re actually mindful of what’s happening.

So the first step is always to get mindful. Now what I mean by this is to become aware of what we’re doing, the actions we’re taking, the foods that we’re eating. The first thing that we do when we wake up in the morning. What is the first thing that we put in our mouth? What is the first thing that we say? Do we jump out of bed or are we rolling over and clicking the snooze button? What are the routines that we have in our life already? So getting really mindful of what we do, when we do it, and why we do it.

Hopefully that’s going to start to identify. So the first step is to be mindful. The second step is to identify.  Because as we’re mindful and we can see the patterns rather than just going through the motions, we start to question, “Why do I do this? How do I do this?” We start to identify the things which aren’t really working for us. So it might be every day you go and have lunch at the same place. Why do you do it? Because you do it every day, when it comes down to it.  And that could be the only reason.

But if we get mindful and start to think, “Why do I do that?” it might be because it’s a good healthy option. It’s because it’s close to where we work or where we are at home. It might be because it’s financially a good option. Thinking around all the different things, being mindful of what we’re doing. Then we can identify the things and in step number three, it’s all about getting really honest with ourselves.

So step three is being honest enough to understand why that’s in our life and understanding where we are in our situation. So if you are struggling with eating and perhaps you’ve put on a few pounds or you’re just feeling a little bit down in our body, it’s identifying it.  To be mindful, then identifying that and being really honest of who we are.

So the best thing we can do if we’re going to try and lose some weight is to really work out where our starting point is.  That might be jumping on the scales. (I’m not a big fan of scales but I do think that they have a place overall) So jumping on the scales, taking some measurements. Maybe it’s getting our blood pressure checked, getting a blood test to see what our sugar levels are like. Any of these things, it’s getting really honest.  So that we know where we currently stand and where e can progress on to.

This applies right across the board. So I’m talking about food because to be honest, it’s something I’m really passionate about.  I love food.  I love to eat.  But it could be in a relationship that you’re in  Spending time with that person, starting to get really honest of how much time you spend with them. What is it about them that’s perhaps pulling you down or not allowing you to get the most out of that relationship?

So step 3 – get really honest. The next thing is to release. So if this thing isn’t serving us and it’s creating noise in our life, we need to give it up. But it’s not about depravation. It’s not about cold cut chopping it off.  No, it’s about letting go of that habit and those emotions that we go through, letting them go, and then what we’re going to do.

Step number five, is to add into that. So bring something alongside it that’s going to distract us from how we feel.  You see, if we’re not ready to release those emotions or release that habit or release that thing which is holding us back in our life, we’re not able to move forward. So whilst we don’t have to let go of it straight away, we want to make steps towards letting go.

Note, you might find that actually if you go cold turkey to let go and that works for you, that’s going to be really good. That’s going to be a quicker way if you are up for that. But if this thing has got quite a hold in your life, where you’re really struggling to move beyond how it works in your life, cold turkey isn’t always the best option.

So start to think about other things that you can introduce into your life.  If it’s a friendship, a relationship that’s not quite right, maybe it has gone a bit sour or maybe it’s the activities that you do together. If you go out with your girlfriends and you find that you’re constantly going out for drinks and you say, “I will just have one,” and one turns into two or three and before you know it, there’s food alongside those drinks and you’re back at that point going, “Why did I do this?”

But instead of doing that, perhaps start to open up your circle of friends.    Identify some other friends to spend time with or some different activities with your current friends that you could do which aren’t going to open up that same habit, that same situation which isn’t working towards your best life. That’s where being mindful really comes into play here, being mindful of what’s going on.

OK, so let’s recap. Step number one was get mindful. Step number two is to identify. Number three is to be really honest with ourself, where we currently are. Number four is to release that noise, to let go of it. Number five is to substitute or to add in, so starting to bring other things in to fill any void left from whats been released. Then number six is actually just to be really proud when we move forward, when we reduce that noise. Yes, let’s be really proud.

So if you have a good week eating, be really proud of that. Really own that. Don’t fob it off as something else. If you have a chance where you can go out with a girlfriend and it seems completely different, you have different activities, or even just like the level of the conversation is a little bit higher than it normally is. Something like that, be really proud of that, but start to nurture it as well.

We want to nurture all of the progress that we make and we want to continue moving forward. Now I don’t believe that this ever comes to an end.  There’s always going to be something in our life that we can improve on. But don’t get disheartened by that. It takes time but the little things that we can do now make such a massive difference to our future.

So have a think about the future version of you, the ultimate version of you, the happy, happy version, what they would be doing in their day, how they will be showing up in their life. Identify things that they would have in their life that you don’t currently have. Pursue those things and also release the things which aren’t going to get you to that point.

I hope that’s really helpful. That’s my little blurb for the day. I love all this stuff. I will be back again next Monday. So have a great time and I will catch you soon.

Kirsty x 

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